Enrich Your Negotiation Skills By Discovering The One Element That Separates The Men From The Boys During A Negotiation Deal

There is 1 central idea, one important factor that is very important to comprehend.

Get this right and you will be compensated with profitable, gratifying and long term relationships in which price is not the only factor. If you don't have this right, you will battle with sub optimal business relationships and you will most likely end up bartering about price in probably all of your negotiations.

The key element is understanding the interests of your counterpart in your negotiations; this is an important element taught in negotiation training.

Most of us have a good awareness of our own objectives, needs and desires. When we negotiate with others, we usually begin with attempting to persuade them to see the world the way that we do. We think it makes sense to us, surely it must make sense to everyone else. The problem with this approach is that it completely ignores the objectives, needs and desires of the other side.

What good is it trying to persuade another person to do anything that they don't trust would be in alignment with their objectives, beliefs and desires?

You will never persuade anybody to agree with you by disagreeing with them, quite the contrary will happen. Because you tell someone that they are incorrect and you are the one that is right, you will compel them to defend their position rather than listen to yours. Nobody likes to be told that they are wrong and if you express to them that they are incorrect it will become very important for them to defend their stance because their personal integrity is at risk.

It is rare to achieve agreement with someone after you have told them that they are wrong, you have also managed to paint yourself into a corner. If it was key for you to reach consensus and you loose the argument, then you will have to compromise your own integrity by departing from your 'correct' stance to accept the argument of the other side.

If you want to reach agreement the easy way rather than have your negotiations spiral into a positional argument, here's what I suggest that you should do:

Start by making some enquiries, the best of which you can ask will be questions designed to uncover the interests behind the positions that the other side have assumed in the negotiation. Open questions are the best kind of questions to show the interest or motivators that reinforce your counterpart's positions.

Here's a great question you can ask and at the same time endorsing your negotiation skills: Why are you negotiating with me / my organisation?

This is quite possibly the best question to ask at the start of a negotiation. Follow this question by asking the other side to expand on and to prioritise the reasons offered in response to your questions. Then you will have a prioritised list of their most important interests.

Sample Interests:
- Individual: Security, Acknowledgment and Control
- Organisation: Profit, Risk Avoidance and Strategic Fit (Some important elements you would have learned in purchasing training)

Once you have an understanding of your counterparts' key interests it is a good idea to reveal your own interests. Once all the parties to the negotiation have revealed their interests it will be much easier to recognise the areas of common ground and then it is useful to present your case in the context of how it would meet their interests. This way, you will not have to persuade the other side that your argument is correct; you will only have to demonstrate that your suggested course of action would satisfy their interests.

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